Ignore the stench and do what you have to do

2005-04-06T02:18:00.000-07:00

I live in Hove, a Labour-Tory marginal. I was a loyal Labour voter until 1997, since when - being disillusioned with the continuance of Tory policies on privatisation, as well as the Iraq War - I have voted either Green or Lib Dem. In 2001, when I lived in the safe Labour seat of Oxford East, I indulged myself with a vote for the Green candidate in the hope that they might save their deposit (they didn't).

In Hove, I have a real dilemma. The sitting MP, Ivor Caplin, is (or was) a junior minister of defence and I could not have supported him under any circumstances. He has now retired, to be replaced by Celia Barlow, who seems to have half-decent 'classic' Labour credentials.

I loathe the Tories and Michael Howard in particular. Anyone whose parents benefited from a liberal policy on asylum, and who themselves seeks to exploit xenophobic feeling on the issue is clearly 'lower than vermin'. That will do for him for now. I could not bear the sight of this man smiling as he pauses before entering number 10.

I'd have no problem voting Lib Dem if they stood a chance, but in this particular constituency, under the present electoral system, they don't.

So what to do?

I am intending to cast a 'clothes peg' vote for Labour at this election, and I would urge others in similar circumstances to think about doing the same.

Here is the clothes peg manifesto, for those forced to choose between the bad smell of New Labour and the rotten stench of Old Tory:

1. Purchase a packet of clothes pegs
2. Select a clothes peg of desired colour, perhaps red or orange
3. Place on nose
4. Enter polling booth
5. Vote for Labour candidate, while thinking of all the good things the party have managed to do in the past 60-odd years, and what they might achieve once Blair has gone, and what the Tories will do should they sneak in by the back door
6 Remove peg
7. Hang out washing.

We could do with few more theatrics at elections and bit more amusement too.
It's a pertinent way to make your point about Blair, Howard and our rubbish electoral system.

So do us all a favour - make it Clothes Pegs for Labour.